She knew something was wrong. It was morning so she couldn’t be tired, though she felt that way. She took a deep breath and decided she will ask her husband to take her to the hospital when she go back home. She will buy bread and milk real quick, ditch fruits that she can buy later.
She thought she will take the back alley to the grocery shop, which would be shorter distance from the parking lot. After she moved a few more paces, suddenly she felt a flush of heat. And everything was shiny and then blurred. The last thought that crossed her mind was she was falling on her face, how she wanted to change that, but couldn’t and she lost consciousness.
She opened her eyes and saw whiteness all around. She closed again and opened after some time with the hope things would look different. As she was closing her eyes again the thought bolted in her mind, her baby. She fell down, what happened to her baby. She was gripped by the fear, probably the biggest had ever known. She was very scared to open her eyes. For some reason her body felt numb and she could not feel her baby within.
She opened her eyes when she heard footsteps, she saw the nurse holding a white bundle. She let out a loud sigh of relief and tears erupted. The nurse smiled as she understood and came forward to show her the baby without any delay.
“It’s a boy”, nurse said reassuringly.
“What happened” she asked.
“You collapsed on the road, a man bought you here”. Suddenly it dawned to the nurse she had not cared to know the name of the man. All she knew was this lady was not related to this man, a white very beautiful women cannot be related to a black but he was still concerned and waiting outside to know if his unknown friend was fine.
“Do you want us to inform anyone, your family or your relatives?” the nurse asked.
“Can I meet him?” she asked sincerely.
“I will ask him to see you right away”, the nurse left the room, leaving the baby in the cradle. This was a usual practice in such cases, to reassure the worried mother of the presence of their babies.
A man with jeans and dirty black T-shirt entered the room after several minutes. He was in his early 40’s. He was unshaven with unkept hair. He was at the door, not wanting to step in.
“You ok?” he asked in a soft voice as if not comfortable being heard.
“Yes”, she said. He turned to leave.
”I really want to thank you for saving my baby”, she said, she wanted to talk and tell him how grateful she was.
“No problem” , he murmured. He wanted to leave.
“Can you please tell me your name? I will like to name my son after you. You gave him the life, I almost lost for him.” her voice very emotional.
“Don’t, I am not good.” The man said, suddenly very hurt her.
“Pardon me” she asked as she could not hear him.
”Don’t give him my name, I am not good.” His words were clearer this time.
“You saved him” she said loudly, they were having a conversation across the room.
“Ya”, he murmured and started to leave the room. She tried to get up to stop him so that she could finish what she wanted to say. Only that stopped him from leaving, as he reluctantly came back to the room to make sure she stayed in bed. She saw him closely now. He was probably younger than what he looked, his left ear pierced and eyes surrounded by dark circles.
“I don’t know how to say but I am so grateful to you for saving my little boy. I want to know your name so I can give my son your name, so that both of us can remember what you did for us.” she explained on her and her son’s behalf.
He neither looked at her nor replied. He was not looking at the baby in the cradle.
“What is your name”, she asked a little impatient.
“I am no good” he said.
“What is you name? its ok if you don’t want to share, its just a request.” She was suddenly conscience that she might be acting stubborn.
“I am a murderer, you cant call your boy with my name”, he said closing his eyes in pain. She was shocked; she waited for him to continue. Somehow she had more patience than ever before.
Not hearing a reaction, he opened his eyes and turned his face to look at her. He was surprised not to see any disgust.
“I killed a boy, my boy. When I beat my pregnant wife, I got myself drunk enough to kill my own son. My name is not good, if I kill my own family. ”looking with disgust at him hands.
“Me not good.” He said pouring out the grief of his heart in one go, it seemed for the first time.
“What was that you wanted to call your boy? I mean what you wanted to name ….” she asked. “James” he replied softly cutting her short, not sure of the relevance of the question.
“Then may be we should call him James. And you can be his godfather. You can come over and meet him. And when he grows a little old, you can play with him and never hurt him.” She said with clarity, confidence and maturity than ever before. He looked at the first time at beautiful crystal green eyes, and then slowly towards the baby in the cradle. Still unclear of what was happening.
The door was swung open by a tall good looking man, very anxious to see his wife. “What happened, you ok?” he asked as he barged in.
”I am fine, thanks to this gentleman”, she still didn’t knew his name. Her husband looked a little surprised to see a middle aged, poor, black man present in the room.
“He is the godfather of your son James.” She said answering her husband’s quizzing looks and giving a man reason to live, something very different, something better than ever before.
